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Written by Lorien A. Masters
As the sun peeks through my window this morning, and the air outside carries the scent of thawing earth, I feel a gentle nudge to start blooming. This winter, much like the last few, I've struggled to find my footing; my motivation waned, and my social meter hit empty. However, with spring on the horizon, I sense a whisper of my energetic self returning.
I've always found it challenging to resonate with the "new year, new you" mantra that dominates Western culture in January. For me, winter signifies a time for dormancy, sleep, and replenishment. It’s not until the arrival of spring that I begin to feel a renewed sense of excitement. This blog might not fit into my usual upbeat tone; however, I believe others might feel the same way.
In a society that glorifies hustle culture and measures success by productivity, it's easy to feel overwhelmed and inadequate when we can't keep up. But as the season changes and nature reminds us of the beauty in taking things slow, it's crucial to let go of societal norms that dictate the pace at which we should be achieving. Instead, let's look inward to find our own sense of direction and pace to navigate this beautiful season ahead.
Throughout this blog, let’s weave together the pieces that can help us step away from the noise and the pace at which those around us are moving and become more intentional with our time. Let's reconnect with who we are, lean into self-compassion, recognize the beauty in setting boundaries, embrace our imperfections, and, last but certainly not least, become more connected with nature. Join me as we explore the beauty of blooming at our own pace and reconnecting with the essence of spring's transformative energy.
Reconnect with Yourself:
Before diving into any changes, it's essential to get honest with ourselves and reflect on where we currently stand. Take a moment to ponder: Are you moving at a pace that aligns with your well-being, allowing you to feel present and engaged with each day's activities? Or do you find yourself being swept up in the current, merely going through the motions dictated by external forces?
Reflect on where joy resides in your daily life. What moments bring you genuine happiness and fulfillment? Consider the pace at which you navigate your days. Do you feel like you have ample time, or are you constantly rushing from one task to another, feeling overwhelmed by the demands placed upon you? Remember, there is no judgment with your findings, but merely awareness.
It's crucial to become the creator of your own life, taking the reins and orchestrating your days in a manner that prioritizes you and your well-being. Let’s pause for a moment and zoom out and assess how you can reorganize your weeks, days, work, and leisure time to ensure that your mental and emotional health remains at the forefront.
Remember, you are the architect of your life. Recognizing your power can be empowering, allowing you to reclaim control over your time and decisions. While this process may require some trial and error, tune into how you want to feel throughout your days and what holds the most meaning for you. From there, you can begin to prioritize and design a life that reflects your values and desires.
Practice Self-Compassion:
Navigating transitions can be challenging, so be gentle with yourself during these times. Understand that it's okay to have moments of rest and relaxation, and remember that your worth is not tied to your productivity. I know it can feel difficult, especially when social media portrays seemingly perfect and abundant lives. However, it's essential to recognize that these are curated glimpses, not full realities. Comparisons are natural, but dwelling on them can steal our joy.
When we constantly push ourselves to be productive, it's a reflection of our nervous system's response to the fast-paced world we live in. Rest can feel uncomfortable because our nervous system is accustomed to constant activity. Somatic exercises, which involve focusing on physical sensations to regulate the nervous system, can be immensely helpful in finding comfort in slowing down. These exercises help reset our understanding of safety and comfort. Consider integrating activities like deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or grounding techniques into your daily routine to support your journey toward a gentler pace of life.
Deep Breathing Exercise: Find a comfortable seated or lying position. Close your eyes and bring your attention to your breath. Inhale deeply through your nose, allowing your belly to rise as you fill your lungs with air. Exhale slowly through your mouth, feeling your belly fall. Focus on the sensation of your breath as it moves in and out of your body. Repeat this deep breathing exercise for several minutes, allowing yourself to relax and let go of tension with each breath.
Deep breathing activates the body's relaxation response, which helps counteract the effects of the sympathetic nervous system (responsible for the "fight or flight" response) and promotes a sense of calmness and relaxation. By focusing on slow, deep breaths, you can stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for the body's rest and digestion functions.
Set Boundaries:
Boundaries are the loving embrace we give ourselves to foster healthy relationships and emotional well-being. As someone who has grappled with boundaries for a long time, I understand the challenges all too well. Wrestling with people-pleasing tendencies, my default response to requests or activities has often been an enthusiastic YES. Rewriting this script hasn't been easy, but I've discovered the power of pausing for 30 minutes or giving myself time to reflect deeply. By assessing whether I have the time and energy to give to the person making the request and examining my schedule leading up to and following this request, I can discern if my response is an empowered yes or perhaps a necessary no. This process allows me to create space for a slower pace and intentional presence in my life.
Setting boundaries doesn't mean building walls to shut people out; instead, it's about creating clear guidelines to protect ourselves and others. It is an act of self-care and respect, affirming that we have the right to prioritize our needs and values. When we establish and communicate boundaries effectively, we reduce feelings of overwhelm, resentment, or being taken advantage of by others.
Learn to say no to activities or commitments that drain your energy and don't serve your purpose. Protect your time and prioritize activities that nourish your soul. It can be easy to get swept up in all the things surrounding you, saying yes to so many that suddenly your calendar is slammed. Take a moment to consider what activities give you energy versus those that deplete you. How many "extras" do you want to take on in a week or weekend, and who or what would those activities consist of?
Starting with a list of non-negotiables can be a great place to begin. For instance, if you know that moving your body is non-negotiable, consider what other commitments, sports, activities, or classes you have. Then, assess how social you like to be and how much time you need in between activities to recharge. By setting boundaries and honoring your needs, you can create a more balanced and fulfilling life.
Embrace Imperfection:
Release the pressure to be perfect and embrace the beauty in imperfection. Sometimes, the biggest pressure to achieve, to do it all and do it all perfectly, comes from within. Imagine meeting your inner child—what would they say to you? What do they truly need? It's unlikely that their response would involve a perfectly decorated home, a flawless body, or being the best at their job. Instead, they might long for the freedom to be who they are without constraints, to dance and play in the sun with nowhere to be and nothing to do.
How can we reconnect with our inner child and allow them to lead the way? As adults, we often desire control and hold high expectations for ourselves and those around us. But how rigid are these expectations, especially for yourself? Do they align with the life you truly want to build or the pace you're trying to maintain?
Let's challenge ourselves to loosen the grip of these expectations and tune back into that childlike sense of wonder and possibility. Instead of fighting against ourselves to meet society's demands, let's embrace all aspects of ourselves—the highs, the lows, the mess, and the buttoned-up everything. Remove your adult filters and consider: What could embracing all of you hold for you? Remember that mistakes and failures are where the biggest lessons and redirections of life emerge. So, let's lean into imperfection and discover the beauty in embracing our authentic selves, just as we are.
Connect with Nature:
Spend time outdoors and immerse yourself in the beauty of the natural world. Let the rhythm of nature inspire you to slow down and appreciate the present moment. When life starts to feel overwhelming, one of the first things I do is step away from the chaos and go for a walk in nature. The space and time it takes to step out of the energy that is happening allows me to reflect, digest, and change the energy.
Mother Earth moves at her own pace, which is evident in the ups and downs, snow, and sun of spring. Her dance is not linear but a fluid back-and-forth evolution over time. By observing nature's cycles, we can learn to embrace life's rhythms and find our own sense of balance and flow.
Consider how you can take cues from nature to help ground yourself and shift your energy throughout the day. Perhaps it's starting your morning with a mindful walk in the park, taking breaks to gaze at the sky or listen to the rustling leaves, or ending your day with a sunset meditation. Let the beauty and serenity of the natural world guide you in reconnecting with yourself and finding peace amidst life's whirlwind.
As we transition into April and the season of renewal, let's remember to honor our own unique rhythms and embrace the gentle pace of spring. From reconnecting with ourselves to setting boundaries, embracing imperfection, and connecting with nature, each step we take allows us to reclaim our authenticity and prioritize our well-being.
In a world that often glorifies hustle culture and perfection, it's empowering to recognize that we have the power to redefine success on our own terms. By letting go of societal norms and tuning into our own needs, we can cultivate a sense of inner peace and fulfillment that transcends external expectations.
So, take a deep breath, feel the warmth of the sun on your skin, and allow yourself to bloom at your own pace. Trust in the wisdom of nature's cycles and the beauty of your own journey. With each mindful step forward, may you feel content and empowered to embrace the season ahead, blooming into spring on your own terms.